insidesuzyssoul











{October 3, 2011}   Some people are strange

Just received this email . It was from Dan of Dan and Anna. How odd. I’ll let Dan tell his own story.

 

Hi,

This email has been a long while in coming.

SHORT VERSION
I’m sending this out to a fair few people, mostly good people, who I have come into
contact with over time through several chat rooms and swing sites.
To get to the point quickly for those who want to get on, I just wanted to say that
there are no meetings or arrangements of the type discussed in messenger or any other
chat room – there never have been. Its all fantasy and imagination, made up stuff and
on the fly reactions to various thoughts and suggestions which were proposed by
people during chats.
It is true that we have been into swinging some while but its actually my wife who is
in control and calls the shots on that side of things. She has always had a huge
sexual energy and swing clubs allow her to express herself in that and is how we got
into the scene.

Some people will be rather annoyed at this truth but there are also those too that
chatted from the same fantasy and role play perspective who were aware that no matter
how well played out the chats were, this was all unreal storytelling.

I would like to apologise for the time taken up by the various chats and
conversations, some of which were rather bizarre or over the top and some with a
darker bdsm type theme and scenario that of course never happened, never took place
and were total figments of imagination and beyond reality.

For the short part of the email thats it, finished – time to move on.
All the chatroom and profiles will be closed down and this email address will be
closed within a week and this letter is my beginning of closure on this chapter of
one of my particular life challenges –
Its been hard to do, necessary and no turning back and I hope no chats have caused anyone any issues.
I wish you well in your ventures and adventures and hope life treats you well.

EXTRA DETAILS FOR THOSE THAT WANT TO KNOW:
The short version above couldn’t hope to give much background or detail, and so for
those who want to know more and understand, and who themselves may be caught up in a
similar “addiction” to chat rooms and and the discussion of sexual themes, and how
that can snowball into crazy type chats totally out of character, I wanted to explain
as briefly as I could, how I got caught up on this originally.

CHATROOM ADDICTION:
It was once suggested to me last year that I maybe addicted to chat rooms and the
discussion of sexual themes and encounters. At the time it was a thought that I had
never considered but since this was mentioned, I have come to see the similarity in
other addictions.

QUICK HISTORY:
My wife and I are one of the easiest going and outgoing couples you could know and we
have been pretty much happily married for 10 years now and together for 14 years.
Contrary to the chatroom talks, she is the one in control – she has always had a lot
of sexual energy and it was her desire to go to a swing club years ago.
This brought us into contact with swing sites and chat rooms. This was a great social
setup and we can say that we have had some amazing times and been privileged to have
met with some wonderful people over the years, in the UK and abroad.
The swing sites and chatrooms helped get people together for parties and we were
having a great time.

CHANGES:
Things changed 2 years ago when my wife suffered a serious condition that
meant she couldnt work and was no longer able to function in social situations.
So severe was this issue that she contemplated ending her life and as things spiralled out of control she needed hospitalisation for
several months.

Visiting her every day for months in the hospital was distressing and was a huge drain over time.
Various other events during this time took things down even further.
I became a bit of a recluse, withdrawing from any social stuff and barely even seeing close friends or
family. I was using just about all energies to ensure my wife was supported and I was taking care of everything.

This awful, lonely and depressing period of time was when I found myself more and
more being drawn to chat rooms – where In the chatrooms I could communicate and
express myself for a while and let out thoughts and feelings. It was during these
dark days that various fantasies and outpourings were expressed with strangers in
chatrooms and various conversations regards sexy meets were brought up.
Some of those conversations could drift towards extreme or bizarre and all the while
I hid the fact that my poor wife was very ill and we were no longer on the scene.

PICTURES:
Another area of expression for me that was borne out of this dark period, was that
being an artist, I used my skills to amend various images I found on the internet of
attractive ladies to make them look like home made photos – pretending that they were
of my wife or us at a party etc.

I have to say that looking back I believe the chatrooms actually helped me to get through a
tough and difficult period in our life during a time when my wife was unable to do anything for
herself and I was very much alone and in pain.
After a stressful work day, piling finacial issues and a visit to the hospital, it
seems that having at least some sort of outlet had its place – and the chatrooms
became that place.
I have no real vices, dont drink dont smoke dont do drugs, dont gamble – chat rooms
became the vice and an addiction.

MOVING ON:
My wife has made what seems to be a full recovery, its been a long slow haul and has
drained us of much energies. This recovery actually happened last year however, the
“addiction” didn’t end once she was better. I was still using chatrooms.

Where once the chatrooms were an outlet, a crutch or place to shed pent up emotions
or stress for a chap with troubles, where they had helped me get through some bad
times and seved a purpose, they had now become a burden on energy and time.

We both have great jobs in the city, the future seems bright, she’s got way more
energy than me and yes she’s been needing to indulge her desires, and now it’s time for
things to move on – let go of the tie that has formed between me and chatrooms.
In the same way as an alcoholic must abstain, so too must I.

Im not expecting replies to this email as it is intended as closure on a period of
time, and to give insight for those that might be experiencing anything similar but I will be leaving this old email and messenger online for a week more before closing it
down for good and deleting everything.

Its been hard to do, a necessary step and no turning back and I hope none of the chats have ever caused anyone any issues.

best wishes, thanks for listening, now and in the past and I wish you well for the future.

all the best

Dan

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